The Search for the Plagioclase Feldspar

As Redan leaned his weary body against his steely saber, he peered upwards over the horizon at the glorious zenith that his quest had taken him. He could not fathom the years of toil it took him to finally arrive at this heaven on Earth. As the sun loomed over the valley, he saw the glistening sparks of light that gleamed from the holy gem. Here lies the plagioclase feldspar, this panacea of all ills. Its sheer pulchritude alone, brings hope to all.

As Redan reflected on his long journey, he remembered his trial before the great Jabberwocky, where he successfully answered three riddles. Where is Carmen Sandiego? Who is Carmen Sandiego? Why are you asking me these stupid questions? He recollected his immense battle with the odious Beast of Tuurkhu, his crossing of the Seas of Armageddon, his seduction of the Wicked Fairy of the West, and how he ate the bitter root of justice and seared the forbidden steak. His long crusade was finally over.

Every corpuscle in his body tinged with trepidation as he held the angelic rock in his worn and parched hands. As Redan lifted the lustrous jewel to the sky, he noticed something was strangely wrong. As Redan’s eyes squinted along the intertwining angles of the stone, he began to realize that it wasn’t the plagioclase feldspar after all. It was its distant cousin – the orthoclase feldspar. Redan fell to his knees and crouched in pain, as he began to weep years of sorrow on that lonely hill.